Words. Watch your words. Watch your mouth. Don’t say that to your sister! I heard myself telling my little women this again this morning. And then I thought about the tone I was using. The words I spoke still hung in the air. They rang in my ears.
“Words are like eggs dropped from great heights; you can no more call them back than ignore the mess they leave when they fall.” Jodi Picoult
Five minutes later, I was back in the room with them admitting that this is a huge challenge for me. I apologized to them for using words filled with anger. I asked them to think about how my words made them feel. I asked them to think about how their words could make others sad or angry.
We talked about how this is a cycle in our family. Kid 1 calls kid 2 a —–. Kid 2 gets mad. She holds onto it for a little while and later calls kid 3 a —-. Then kid 3 fires back at kid 2. And kid 1 steps in and says—-. It gets ugly. And then I step in and blow up, rant and say —-. Harm is done every step of the way, by all of us.
This should not be my role. Maybe this is typical of motherhood, but I’m not comfortable with this. I’m supposed to bring peace and compromise. When I keep my head, I’m able to do that, with good words and a positive tone. Do no harm is a principle I live by. I fail often. I keep trying.
So it leads me to wonder, who needs changing here?
Maybe it’s them. It’s definitely me.
Use your words wisely.
This is my one and only resolution. And I think it will cover a multitude of issues in my world, even if I am slightly successful. The words we speak have tremendous impact and staying power. We can make a choice to lift someone up or bury them in shame.
It’s our superpower.
With great power comes great responsibility. Yes, I’m quoting Spiderman’s Uncle Ben. The guy had a point. I need to use this power carefully and not let Dark Mom Rise.
I want to use my words to uplift, inspire and make people laugh. I think it’s a choice that needs to be made constantly, everyday.
“My task, which I am trying to achieve is, by the power of the written word, to make you hear, to make you feel–it is, before all, to make you see.”